Have you ever had a friend or family member say something so off the mark that it nearly boils your blood? I had one of those moments a few weeks ago while having a conversation with someone. No stranger to the rude or oblivious things people can sometimes say, I found myself in the midst of yet another awkward conversation that essentially had financial roots.
Somehow, we got on the topic of our parents and their careers. Mind you, we were not discussing money, but what types of jobs our parents held. When I asked my roommate what her father did, she replied, “Oh, he doesn’t have to work anymore BUT he was an executive at [insert name of Fortune 100 company]….” immediately followed by, “Yeah, I come from money.”
Excuse me? Did I just hear you correctly? I asked what your father does for a living and your response included the phrase, ‘Yeah I come from money?!?”
Needless to say, I was a bit taken back by her response to my question. After thinking about our exchange, I began to connect some dots: I began to see a trend in this person’s past behaviors, coupled with her response about her father’s job, that clearly indicated that this girl periodically behaves like a spoiled entitled. little. brat….
Now while this post seems to be one long rant about this person, it’s also about the central issue of a young female who grew up in a privileged environment who acted cheap when it came to others but spent ruthlessly when it benefited only her. Someone who thought an appropriate response to ‘What does your father do’ is to include ‘Yeah, I come from money.’ I’m fascinated by the oblivion she seems to exist in.
Contemplating this further, I wonder if our stark differences in saving, spending, and sharing are a product of our respective upbringings? In my Confessions of a PF Blogger series, I’ve highlighted the obvious fact that I came from nothing, financially speaking. What is the correlation between adult work ethic, interpersonal relationships, financial generosity, and how much money our parents had when we were growing up?
If I had to decide based only on my experiences with this person, I’d have to say that growing up rich sometimes tends to lead to selfish, entitled behaviors as an adult. But is this fair? I know some people who are leaps and bounds ahead of me financially who are fabulously selfLESS.
Now that I’ve opened the proverbial can of worms, I leave it to you, my readers: What do you think?
I had a roommate similar to yours. We ended up kicking him out. He always talked about money and how much greater he was than others. He had HORRIBLE social skills though and I'm thinking it's the fact that his mother married SEVEN times for money and he could never keep a relationship for very long. I would say that money makes who you are, but it can be good or bad. It just depends on the person and how they take it.
It is definitely an interesting question, but I don't think coming from money makes you a selfish person. Coming from jerk parents might help, but even then that might not be the issue. My ex-step mother was one of the most selfish and miserly people I have ever had the displeasure of ever knowing. But she grew up in a shack with six brothers and sisters and my father certainly wasn't wealthy, but it was a step up for her I suppose. On the other hand, my best friend's family are extremely wealthy and he is one of the most generous people I know. His family is extremely frugal, but they are also very giving.I also have a very self-entitled cousin and I don't know where that attitude came from considering her parent are not wealthy.
I get where you are coming from but it isn't necessarily true.I know a few people who "came from money" but have very good financial habits and are very modest when it comes to talking about how lucky they were.I also know a few who "came from money" but completely reject it to prove that they can make it on their own or for some other personal reason.Then they are those like your ex roommate. The thing is though, it doesn't matter if you had a hard life or an easy life. Your money habits develop on your own accord and is somewhat influenced by your friends and your surroundings.
I am loving this feedback (and I agree with all of it)!! Thank you & keep it coming
My first instinct at her response of "coming from money" was that she was possibly insecure about that fact and pointing out the elephant in the room. But after you explained her other traits, I can see she just comes from bad stock. I believe our financial upbringing plays a part in our adult financial habits, but I also believe that personality, character, and adult experiences help shape that too.
I agree with the other posters, if they're raised as spoiled brats, rich or poor, they'll be spoiled brats, period. That said, your room ate sounds like a schizo… lol! Not fun!
Oh, goodness. It was pretty obvious – she didn't need to state it outright. I have quite a few friends who come from relatively wealthy families (one's dad is actually my fiance's boss). They were raised well though and not spoiled by any stretch of the imagination. I've certainly met a couple of the spoiled brat variety, though – the kind who judge you on the car you have, etc – and can't stand their company for a second.